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Friday, June 13, 2003

What part of "HELL, NO!" is unclear?

I hate to start sounding like a "South Park"-quoting 12-year old, but what starts running through my head whenever I hear the phrase "liturgical dance" is: "Gay. Super gay. Liberace gay." Not that there's anything wrong with that....

That, and "Time to join the Melkites!"

Now, after clear bans issued by both the Vatican and the American bishops, it looks like the bad performance-art idiocy that is "liturgical dance" will be getting a second look from Our Shepherds™.

Why? Well, why not? Who doesn't want to see chubby dissidents flouncing about in leotards and leg warmers? Nothing says "holy sacrifice of the Mass" quite like dis-habited Sophia-worshipping nuns pirouetting with streamers. No, sir.

When I think "re-presentation of Calvary", I picture this.

And the above is what Our Shepherds™ are going to be considering shortly.

No, the flouncers aren't going to let anything like a clear "No Frickin' Way!" from Rome (or most Catholics) stop them. Not when Our Shepherds™ are so willing to give them a respectful hearing.

Apparently, there's some ambiguity in "No Frickin' Way!" that I, a trained dissembler in the legal arts, have not been able to discern.

But then again, I'm not one of Our Shepherds™. Therein, apparently, lies all the difference.

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