Not gonna happen.

The great Anglican flood into Catholicism, that is. Why? Well, unless they happen to have cabins right next to Ted Kaczynski's place in Montana, most Anglicans have probably seen the headlines about the problems in our house for the past two years. Not exactly an inspiring witness, especially to people who are smarting over the flouting of biblical injunctions on sexual behavior.

But the greater problem will be AmChurch flacks horrified at the notion of ruggedly orthodox Anglicans pouring into the Church, especially if they try to do so as a parish. "My goodness! They're homophobes! They don't like women priests! They're scriptural fundamentalists! Their liturgies are exclusive and distant! Besides, the Spirit of Vatican II says it's unecumenical to convert...."

In other words: "Repel boarders!" It has happened around the country. The souls of Anglicans don't count--not when measured against the grand plans for NewChurch.

Thousands of energized Anglicans could ruin the plans of many a diocesan progressive on any number of issues. Couple that with the lack of energy and imagination seen so often in American Catholic ordinaries, and you have the recipe for greatly-strengthened continuing Anglican and Eastern Orthodox Churches. For example, here in Detroit we don't even have an indult Mass (so much for Ecclesia Dei's call for generosity), so don't get all fired up for an Anglican Use parish.

By all means, though, Anglican brothers and sisters--come aboard! Despite my near-metronomic griping, Catholicism is the Barque of Peter and is well-worth the trouble. The pearl of great price can be found here. Things are--albeit often imperceptibly and not without reverses--starting to improve. We are slowly beginning to outlive our "Spirit of V2" contingent.

Just don't be surprised by a frosty "welcome" from those you are trying to join.