Now hear this:
Gentle Readership, your host's birthday is nigh upon you.
And not one of you has sent me a present yet.
Nevertheless, that oversight can still be remedied. All I want from you is this item here. For some reason, my much better half has been...hesitant.
BTW, there's a very good chance you can find it cheaper on Bookfinder.
You don't have to wrap it, either.